Intoxination

New Rule For Dick Cheney (plus an overdue introduction to New Rules)

For those of you that do not know what New Rules are, well they are just
that; New Rules. It is not my own idea, but one I am borrowing from Bill Maher.
Every week Bill ends his Real Time with
Bill Maher
show on HBO with a set of new rules looking back at events and
that which we could view as preposterous. It is a great segment on his show, and
I encourage all of you to check it out when his show returns in August, or go to
the Real Time website where you can view an archive of Bill’s New Rules.

I have decided to, on occasion, write of my own new rules in order to bring a
sense of satire to my blog and also show my readers just how ridiculous events
in today’s news seem to have become. If I hurt anyone with my New Rules, well
then I want to give a very deep hearted “WHAAAAA” to you because you brought
them on yourself, and I am just poking some fun at what you have done or will
do. So without further a due, I present my readers with my very first “New
Rule”.


NEW RULE: If you can dish it out, then you better be able to take it.

Now I am a blogger, and I might make comments or offer opinions that some
well see as off colored or to far to the left. That is what I do, and that is
what the first amendment allows me to do. I also welcome any constructive
criticism or jabs directed back at me which is why I allow total open commenting
on my posts.

Dick Cheney, in an interview to Fox’s own Hannity and Colmes, was upset with
comments DNC chairman Howard Dean made last week when he called the Republican
Party “A White Christian Party”. Cheney was so upset over this that he fired
back with his own snap and said:

“I’ve never been able to understand his appeal. Maybe his mother loved him,
but I’ve never met anybody who does. He’s never won anything, as best I can
tell,”

Now this maybe what Vice President Cheney would consider the ultimate “SLAM”,
thinking he got Howard Dean by dragging his mother into it (remember grade
school “oh oh oh your mama”), but the fact is, Mr Vice-President, your facts are
wrong.

Let’s not forget that Howard Dean did win the Governors seat in Vermont five
times, and also, just this year, won the election as chairman of the DNC. Now
Mr. Cheney, the mother joke was rather colorful and reminiscent of my grade
school days, but Dr. Dean’s statement about the Republican Party being mostly
white Christian does bear some truth.

Latest polls have shown that 74% of republicans in fact are white Christians.
Now considering our administrations math problems, which is evident by our
budget and the plan for social security reform, allow me to explain in a way
that your mindset of a school yard bully might understand. 50% + 1 is a
majority. 66% is roughly 2/3 and is what it takes for congress to overturn a
Presidential veto. 75% that is three quarters and is what Congress would need to
repeal a Constitutional amendment. 74% well that is a “helluva” a lot. In fact
74% proves Dr. Dean’s point.

Now don’t get upset over this. Us liberals are still doing ok after being
called “unpatriotic” because we feel the war in Iraq is unjust. We have been
dealing with being coined as “America haters” because we exercise our rights and
our minds when we question the motives of our government. So when your party
goes around and does things such as sign bills into law inside a church, or
denounces gay marriage because “god does not like it”, then yes you are a white
Christian party. Why are you suddenly ashamed of this?

Let’s also not forget your past Mr. Cheney. You and your wife both were
outraged over Senator Kerry mentioning your lesbian daughter during a
Presidential debate. You insisted that a apology be given by Senator Kerry for
this and your very own wife even called it, “a cheap and tawdry political
trick”. So why is it you now feel you are empowered to bring peoples families
into the political arena. It’s not ok for Democrats to do it, but the
Republicans; well they can do whatever they want?

Now let’s also not forget what Howard Dean’s job is – He is the chairman of
the DNC, your party’s rival. His job is to promote the DNC and if need be bring
out embarrassing facts about the Republicans. Just the same as your chairman Ken
Mehlman should not be out sucking up to the Democrats. Politics is a dirty game.
It is a game in which dirty laundry gets aired and name calling occurs. Ask John
McCain about that, or do you forget how your running mate smeared him and his
wife in the 2000 primaries?

No Mr. Cheney, your wrong. I, and many other Democrats think Howard
Dean is doing a great job and we do love him for his efforts. You look at the
Democrats as “passive” liberals, but now that someone who represents them is
coming out on the offensive you are scared. Unlike the media, Howard Dean knows
his rights and says what he knows and what he thinks. You can not bully him like
you have the media.

Let me give you this analogy to help you understand more. It is like that
bully in school. He can pick and pick on all the people until that one person
stands up to him and calls him out for what he is. After that, the bully is not
as strong or tough as he once appeared. You Mr. Cheney are that bully. Another
reminder of this is how you decided to call Kim Jong-il names on Larry King,
while we are in the process of trying to hold diplomatic talks with him so that
we can avoid another cold war. Diplomacy does not involve name calling, unless
you are John Bolton.

So in closing, I would like to ask a couple things of Mr. Cheney. Are you
upset that your daughter is a lesbian and ashamed of her for it? Also, are you
ashamed that your party is 74% white Christian, and in order to cover that up
you go on the defensive by pulling out childish your mama insults?

While you’re thinking about that, let me give a piece of friendly advice.
Instead of wasting time coming up with childish insults and denying what the
underlying foundation of your party is, do some work! Soldiers are getting
killed in Iraq everyday but we have yet to see a plan to bring them home. Osama
Bin Laden is still running around making home videos and there is no sign we
will catch him. Our economy is on the verge of collapse yet the administration
worries about how to screw up social security, in what is a dead cause. Wait.
How about you work on how you are going to cover your asses on the ever growing
pile of evidence supporting the fact you and your “New American Century” buddies
wanted to take over Iraq no matter what. That’s a good one to work on, because
me and at least 540,000 others that have signed Rep. Conyers letter want to hear
the answers and we are waiting very impatiently. It’s hard to be patient while
we know our men and women in uniform are dying!!!

As a side note, if you come across this blog Mr. Cheney, I will not respond
to a letter from your office demanding that it be removed. I know you have
practiced this with one other site that posted a humorous picture of your wife,
but you were sworn to uphold the Constitution and that very piece of parchment
allows me to make these kind of comments.

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